Friday, June 26, 2009

Rooster

Rooster

Farmer Brown woke up one morning to discover that his one and only rooster was dead. The chickens had started to get rather restless, so he called his friend, Farmer Black, to see if he knew any place he could get a rooster. Farmer Black told him that Farmer Red, two roads over, was trying to sell some of his roosters, Farmer Brown thanked him, and drove over to Farmer Red's. He knocked on the door and Farmer Red answered. He told him that he wanted the horniest rooster he had. He had just the rooster. He came back a minute later with the rooster at his heels and said to Brown "This is Rudy. He's the horniest rooster I've seen this side of Texas." Farmer Brown took Rudy home and placed him in front of the chicken coop. For about and hour, he could hear was the flapping of feathers and very loud squawks. Rudy strutted out of the coop... and walked straight into the stables. For about an hour Farmer Brown could hear the stomping of hooves and very loud "neigh"ing. Rudy strutted out of the stable. But he didn't stop there. He marched straight into the cow's field. Farmer Brown, feeling he really didn't need to watch, went to bed. The next morning he woke up and walked outside, but he saw to his disappointment Rudy laying on his back on the front lawn, vultures circling overhead. As he approached the rooster, Rudy whispered to the vultures "He's coming closer... keep going! He still thinks I'm dead!"

Dog good at Balance

Dog good at Balance

Dog good at Balance ..

You must look to car mirror

funny car
You must look to your car mirror ..

Famous Football Team

Funny Football Team
Funny Football Team

Crazy Mirror

Crazy Mirror
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Where is the kid ?
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Crazy Mirror

funny students

funny students

Have Fun

New Skiing

New Skiing
New Skiing

Tree's Gate

Tree's Gate .


Look what they did in the road !!
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funny road

Funny questions and answers about animals 2


Funny Questions And Answers About Animals
( 2 )


What's the definition of a narrow squeak ?
A thin mouse !!

How do mice celebrate when they move home ?
With a mouse warming party !!

Where do fish wash ?
In a river basin !!

Where do frogs keep their money ?
In a river bank !!

Whats green and can jump a mile a minute ?
A frog with hiccups !!

How do frogs die ?
They kermit suidide !!

What fish goes up the river at 100mph ?
A motor pike !!

What did the mouse say when his friend broke his front teeth ?
Hard cheese !!

What do toads drink ?
Croaka-cola !!

What's the coldest fish in the sea ?
A blue whale !!

What do frogs drink ?
Hot croako !!

Where are most fish found ?
Between the head and the tail !!

Funny questions and answers about animals 1

Funny Questions And Answers About Animals
( 1 )

What looks like half a cat ?
The other half !!

What do cat actors say on stage ?
Tabby or not tabby !!

What is the cat's favourite TV show ?
The evening mews !!

How do you get a cut-price parrot ?
Plant bird seed !!

What language do birds speak ?
Pigeon English !!

What do you give a sick bird ?
Tweetment !!

Do Apes kiss?
Yes, but never on the first date!!

What do mice do when they're at home ?
Mousework !!

What have 12 legs, six eyes, three tails and can't see ?
Three blind mice !!

When should a mouse carry an umbrella ?
When it's raining cats and dogs !!

Carrying heavy

Carrying Heavy
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Carrying heavy .
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Carrying heavy

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Loses his tail

Q : Where does a dog go if he loses his tail?

A : A retailer.

Horses at the Race

horse racing

A champion jockey is about to enter an important race on a new horse. The horse's trainer meets him before the race and says, ''All you have to remember with this horse is that every time you approach a jump, you have to shout, 'ALLLLEEE OOOP!' really loudly in the horse's ear. Providing you do that, you'll be fine.''

The jockey thinks the trainer is mad but promises to shout the command. The race begins and they approach the first hurdle. The jockey ignores the trainer's ridiculous advice and the horse crashes straight through the center of the jump.

They carry on and approach the second hurdle. The jockey, somewhat embarrassed, whispers 'Aleeee ooop' in the horse's ear. The same thing happens , the horse crashes straight through the center of the jump.

At the third hurdle, the jockey thinks, ''It's no good, I'll have to do it,'' and yells, ''ALLLEEE OOOP!'' really loudly. Sure enough, the horse sails over the jump with no problems. This continues for the rest of the race, but due to the earlier problems the horse only finishes third.

The trainer is fuming and asks the jockey what went wrong. The jockey replies, ''Nothing is wrong with me, it's this bloody horse. What is he deaf or something?''

The trainer replies, ''Deaf?? DEAF?? He is not deaf , he is BLIND!''

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Sister Act 2

Sister Act
Whoopi Goldberg
I Will Follow Him
Finale ..

Sister Act 1

Whoopi Goldberg ..
Salve Regina \ Hail Holy Queen ..
from Sister Act


Sunday, June 21, 2009

Funny Kids play

Funny Kids
look what kids did when thier mother went out ...
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Funny Kids

Why do ducks have flat feet?

Why do ducks have flat feet?
To stamp out forest fires
Why do Elephants have flat feet? To stamp out burning ducks ..





Swine Flu Masks

Sure you know Swine Flu ,

You need to know the last news about Swine Flu ....
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Funny Swine Flu Masks

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Funny Swine Flu Masks
Funny Swine Flu Masks

Swine Flu Masks


Funny Swine Flu Masks


Swine Flu


Funny Swine Flu


Funny Swine Flu Masks


Funny Swine Flu Masks

Ducks in Heaven

Ducks in Heaven

Three women die in a car accident and go to Heaven. Saint Peter meets them at the Gates and welcomes them saying "you can do as you please in Heaven, just don't step on any ducks."

The women are puzzled but proceed into Heaven. Looking around, they notice there are ducks everywhere. In a matter of minutes, one of the women steps on a duck.

Saint Peter walks up to the woman with a hideously ugly man. Saint Peter shackles the man and the woman together and says, "for stepping on a duck, you have to spend eternity chained to this ugly man."

The other two women are shocked but go about their business until, sure enough, another woman steps on a duck. Immediately Saint Peter comes and shackles her to another ugly man.

The last woman tries desperately to not step on a duck. After a few months of not stepping on any ducks, Saint Peter walks up to the woman accompanied by a stunningly handsome man. He shackles the woman to the man and after a while, the woman being thrilled to be chained to such a handsome man, says "I don't know what I did to deserve this."

The man replies, "I don't know what you did lady, but I stepped on a duck."

IS THAT YOUR DOG ?

IS THAT YOUR DOG?


A timid little man, walked into a biker bar in the Bronx and clearing his throat asked, "Um, err, which of you gentlemen owns the Doberman tied outside to the parking meter?"

A giant of a man, wearing biker leathers, his body hair growing out through the seams, turned slowly on his stool, looked down at the quivering little man and said, "It's my dog. Why?"

"Well," squeaked the little man, obviously very nervous, "I believe my dog just killed it, sir."

"What?" roared the big man in disbelief. "What in the hell kind of dog do you have?"

"Sir," answered the little man, "it's a little four week old female puppy."

"Bull!" roared the biker, "how could your puppy kill my Doberman?"

"It appears that your dog choked on her, sir."




A lonely Frog

A lonely frog, desparate for any form of company telephoned the Psychic Hotline to find out what his future has in store.

His Personal Psychic Advisor advises him, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."

The frog is thrilled and says, "This is great! Where will I meet her, at work, at a party?"

"No" says the psychic, "in a Biology class."



Saturday, June 20, 2009

Chickens want books

A pair of chickens walk up to the circulation desk at a public library and say, 'Buk Buk BUK.' The librarian decides that the chickens desire three books, and gives it to them...and the chickens leave shortly thereafter.

Around midday, the two chickens return to the circulation desk quite vexed and say: Buk Buk BuKKOOK!' The librarian decides that the chickens desire another three books and gives it to them. The chickens leave as before.

The two chickens return to the library in the early afternoon, approach the librarian, looking very annoyed and say, 'Buk Buk Buk Buk Bukkooook!' The librarian is now a little suspicious of these chickens. She gives them what they request, and decides to follow them.

She followed them out of the library, out of the town, and to a park. At this point, she hid behind a tree, not wanting to be seen. She saw the two chickens throwing the books at a frog in a pond, to which the frog was saying, "Rrredit Rrredit Rrredit..."




Amazing talking dog

A man and his dog walk into a bar. The man proclaims, "I'll bet you a round of
drinks that my dog can talk."

Bartender: "Yeah! Sure...go ahead."

Man: "What covers a house?"

Dog: "Roof!"

Man: "How does sandpaper feel?"

Dog: "Rough!"

Man: "Who was the greatest ball player of all time?"

Dog: "Ruth!"

Man: "Pay up. I told you he could talk."

The bartender, annoyed at this point, throws both of them out the door.
Sitting on the sidewalk, the dog looks at the guy and says, "or is the greatest
player Mantle?"




Why did the cow cross the road?

Why did the cow cross the road?

To go to the mooooovies!


Why did the gum cross the road?

Why did the gum cross the road?

Because it was stuck to the chicken's foot!



Thursday, June 18, 2009

Hungry Baby

Don't leave your baby hungry .....


Because if you leave your baby hungry ,


He will ..........




Hungry Baby

Giant Foot

Giant Foot

Giant Foot ...

MR MONKEY

FUNNY MONKEY
funny MONKEY photo
Oh , It is big problem ....

Friday, June 12, 2009

Funny Questions And Answer ( 3 )

Funny Questions And Answers
( 3 )


Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?
A: He said, “Where am I, Cathy?”
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.


Q: I’m two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.


Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?


Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July fifteenth.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.


Q: Sir, what is your IQ?
A: Well, I can see pretty well, I think.
1 2 3

Funny Baby's Smile

Sweet baby with Funny Smile and Funny Look ..
funny smile

Pretty baby with Funny Smile ..
funny baby

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Girls Funny Photo

Girls Funny Photo

Girls Funny Photo
Four Funny Girls

Monday, June 1, 2009

Finger Square

Finger Square

Finger Square
This is the first finger , Search for the others ..

Funny COCA COLA party

Funny COCA COLA party

Funny chinese party
FUNNY PARTY

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HAVE FUN

Funny hot girl

1 - He saw hot girl in bikini ...
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funny girl

2 - He touched her hand and said " HELLO " .
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funny hot girl

3 - You must see by yourself ..

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funny girl
4 - Now , don't talk to girls on the beach .

Funny Ducks

Funny Duck

Funny Duck

Duck is stealing some dollars from a woman .
Small Ducks : Mammy , hurry hurry ..

Funny Skeletons

Funny Skeletons .
funny Skeletons

Funny Skeletons .
Skeletons are playing funny games .